Orual’s Words

 I ended my first book with the words no answer. I know now, Lord, why you utter no answer. You are yourself the answer. Before your face questions die away. What other answer would suffice? Only words, words; to be led out to battle against other words. Long did I hate you, long did I fear you. I might–

Orual, from Till We Have Faces by C.S. Lewis

There was a time when I became obsessed with C.S. Lewis. I read his autobiography, Surprised by Joy, and set myself up to read all of his other books in time. I never got around to reading any others, though, except for Till We Have Faces, whose book cover invited me in. The quotation above is my favorite part of the book. The last sentence is cut off not intentionally by myself, but because Orual dies while writing that sentence in the book. I wonder a lot what she meant to say after it. I might what? The question lingers in my head each time I read this quotation over again.

What did she mean to say…?